Green Ironies

torture:
2005-07-29 - 11:38 p.m.

...there's a computer in a box in front of me and i can't open it. i've toyed with the idea that really there is no computer in it, and that is how i've been coping with the situation all afternoon. it's a funny thing, humans are able to do. they know that the universe is finite, and thereby has only finite possibilities. they know that the Sol system is finite, and thereby has only finite possibilities. they know that their planet, their nation, their backyard is finite, and thereby has only finite possibilities. but you put a cat in a box, and close the lid so that you're not sure if it's alive or dead, or if possibly there's now an ardvark in the box instead, and suddenly there are inifinite possibilities in the whole of the finite universe.

"what is, is...what isn't, isn't" -John Locke
one may restate Locke thus: if p then p and if ~p then ~p...[insert: a generally illogical proof, followed by the rules for illogic proofs themselves]...that was the theory. now comes the rationale: it really doesn't matter what exists and what doesn't exist. either we are fish in a fish bowl or we are fish in a fishbowl in someone's dream. to the fish, the fishbowl is real. it is folly to assume anything other than that tangible things exist, because it is a precursor to every other assumption one can make. and those assumptions create motives for us to use items in this universe that exist, to get other items in this universe that exist. the crux is that if you want to make a journey into a box in which you don't neccessarily exist, you must first prepare for your journey by obtaining items that will provide you protection from ceasing to exist while you journey into the box. and thus you muct still collect items. and in order to collect items, you must have a motive to collect them.

"...and then she opened her eyes, and they were blue again. it was the darndest thing." -Nemo

have you ever thought that there were a lot of little things that you couldn't see. moving right in front of your face. and you're not sure if you can't see them because you didn't want to see them anymore. or because you never saw them in the first place. but there are many ways to see. and so you can sense they're still there, you just don't know. or can't remember. what they look like?

The day before the fourth of july, for the two-day-late celebration of Daud's birthday, we went fencing in the Berkshires. This is to say, we built a fence. with cedar posts and rails, strighter and sturdier a wooden fence was never built. i have suggested that the building of a fence is a sort of right of passage for new suburban Massachusetts residents. it took the town one year to approve of the materials used, the style of fence, and the method of building it. on the way back to Troy, i passed twelve police vehicles, and was pulled over by three. the fine was 240$ for driving 59 in a 35. i might have gotten away with a warning, had i not slipped and said 'cock' when i meant to say 'cop car'. for the record, i wasn't even in a 35, i was in a 40 that i thought should have been a 55 (it's 55 on the NY side of the hill). but the court fees are more than that extra 5mph difference, so really it's foolish to argue. also, for the record, i was very due for some sort of fine, given the number of motor vehicle violations i've committed in the past two years, icluding two vehicle thefts and months of driving uninspected unregistered and/or uninsured vehicles of my own. the afterparty was alright tho, so it made up for it. no fireworks, but plenty of horseshoes-n-beer and a inflatable bouncy castle for the kiddies (of which there were many).

Mrs. Anderson versus the Toyota dealership. completely new exhaust. new fuel filter. new spark plugs, wires and distridutor cap. new fusable link. all this cost me less than 500$. but to have the rotor button (an 8$ part) replaced by a used one, i had to pay 350$ in service, and the mechanic only put two of the three screws back into the rotor cap. the math is just now settling in.

in other news: Daud's Neon (it has no name farr as i know) had something go boink with the tyres. the cords on the insides were pulled in so that the tyre had the edge of a canadean penny instead of an american one. the obvious solution then, was to allow him to borrow the wheels of my old daytona. it looks a bit funny, riding higher in the back than the thong of an NYC hooker.

i have never seen this poem writen down, anywhere. i'm note sure who to give credit to. i learned it by sound from about the age i learned to read (my first book was "the three little pigs"). "...star light, star bright / first star i see tonight / i wish i may, i wish i might / have the wish, i wish tonight..." i wonder how old it is. i have a sneaky suspicion that i heard it on Sesame Street (TM). but regardless, it is the idea that it was learned purely from sound that amazes me. if you write down a spell in a book, anyone can read it. but if you whisper it so someone, only one person can hear it.

"oatmeal is a strange thing. some of them float to the top, and some of them float to the bottom, but they all float." -axioms of a hippy #827 (index includes repeats)

so for the past month, i have been playing Lineage2, a massively multiplayer game. its supposed to be an RPG, but when people say RPG nowadays what they really mean is that the game dynamics involve progressively longer periods of downtime between stat increases, called "levels". gary gygax was the albert einstien of the gaming industry...he spilt the atom, so that the industry of the day could sell bombs. despite the fact that it is a level-based game, the history of the world is decently rich, the graphics are notable, and the skills and classes are well developed. i had to stop playing becuase i'd signed up to pay for it with a credit card which i later reported as stolen (and then tried to use at the Toyota dealership, but thats another story), and so now i'm missing it, because the console games just dont compare.

Sidenote: at some point i woke up and realized that i no longer write in this diary.

it's a different game every time you play!