been thinking about myself in the first person
2001-09-23 - 8:20 p.m.
Revelation: I have discovered The Ultimate Pillow. I took my laundry out of the dryer, and put it into a sleeping-bag-stuff-sack. Contestants, start your hugging.
I have always been amazed with the story of Louis Braille. Word has it that he was working in his father�s shoppe, and poked his eyes out with an awl. The thing that really gets me is that an awl (a tool for making holes in leather) only has one point; he couldn�t have poked both of his eyes out at the same time. So once he poked out the first eye, how is it possible that he poked out his second? �Well, I�m already half blind, and that hurt like hell, so I might as well go all the way with it...blindness might be the �new� thing in a couple of years...� Or maybe, stupefied by the pain, he curled up on the ground, and (still with the awl gripped tightly in his hand) went to reactively cover his eye that had been hurt, but missed and covered the other eye instead (stabbing with the awl)? At the age of ten, I was sure that his father had done it, because he was drunk and had nothing better to do than poke his kid�s eyes out. Damn those Frenchies, always pokin� their son�s eyes out...tsktsk. At any rate, it�s more evidence to support that smart kids come from evil parents.
Football player in the hall: �One, two, three...one, two, three, four...who wants a beer?�
Me, to mysleves: �Well, at least we know they can still count.�
I pulled an all-nighter, accidentally. Nikki left to go to PA again this weekend, and I didn�t whisper to her to wear her seat belt. I keep telling myself that it�s not my job to save lives...people do what they do for reasons, and if they�re not in the habit of being cautious, you can�t change their minds for �em. Still, I feel like I should�ve said something more...I stayed up all night responding to e-mails and trying to make a Snow Man�s Land Comix. Then, at 10am: the phone rings. It�s my parents, and they�re in Massachusetts for the day...just thought they�d stop by and spend some time with me. This is very suspicious. The obvious ulterior motive was to get me to help throw Step-brother�s stuff into a U-Haul. The not-so-obvious one was that they are socially required to attend next week�s �family visitation weekend� in which people�s parents are supposed to come down and see them. They figure, they saw me this weekend, so they have an excuse not to see me next weekend. Doesn�t really bother me...I�m just happy they paid for my supper this time. Now, back to the U-Haul. Step-brother is moving back to Maine. End of story, prettymuch. Okay, back to shopping, which occurred at some point. I felt so bad. I was in a clothing store, and actually bought non-package clothes. Tried on a Calvin Kline shirt, and it melted right into me. Mmm-these-people-know-how-to-make-a-shirt-feel-good. I spent $98 for drastically reduced Calvin Kline shirts and boxers, and a couple pairs of name-brand pants. It must be noted that I have never spent this much money in the rest of my life on clothes...never spent this much on clothes if you add up all the money I�ve spent on �em. For the last three years, I�d be surprised if I spent $50. Money that could have been spent on friends and memories. Gawd, if this consumistic lifestyle actually keeps up, I might have to *shiver* get an actual job. But it felt so good.
Related Sidenote: If I start buy designer shoes and start stroking them like cats, I hope someone goes out of their way to smack some sense into me.
Approximately a half-an-hour into tomorrow, I�ll hug Nicole; this is all justifiable because she spent the weekend in PA, and we missed her. But she won�t be very responsive, and we�ll leave shortly after. We thinks, we thinks maybe she�s not liking Jason�s, but I�ll entertain my own thoughts and give her the benefit of the doubt, at least for a few days. After all, she prubly just wanted to do homewerk and get some sleepies. I know this, because Futurejason knows this.
Rachel, RA: �It�s not that he�s a bad person, I just got this bad vibe-�
Me: �Did you try replacing the batteries?�
Sir#1: In the beginning, there was Something.
Sir#2: Nonsense my dear Sir. By the definition of The Beginning, there must have been Nothing, from which Something is formed.
Sir#1: Ah, but when the something is formed from nothing, it must come from Somewhere.
Sir#2: Perhaps the Somewhere is a somewhere called Nowhere, but continue with your train nevertheless...
Sir#1: Point. But if it did came from the Somewhere, that somewhere would have to exist, and then the Somewheres become recussive to the first somewhere, which we call Somewhere.
Sir#2: but this has already been assumed, that Somewhere is a term for the ultimate somewhere.
Sir#1: Hence the problem with recursion.
Sir#2: But the problem persists...by definition, nowhere cannot be a somewhere. And how could all of *this* spring into existence?
Sir#1: Exactly my point, my darlin� Sir. It is impossible for Something to come from Nothing.
Sir#2: You Sir, have stolen my point!
Sir#1: Hence the problem with recursion.
Sir#2: Okay, back to the basics...Nowhere is a somewhere, because we have defined it as a lack of somewhere...as the Mitch would say. So in the beginning, the something had to come from somewhere, but not necessarily Somewhere. But by definition,
Sir#1: Your definitions are the problem. Where did they come from?
Sir#2: I dunno, they evolved from something...which evolved from the Something.
Sir#1: So, in the beginning, there must have been Something.
Sir#2: Nono, your logic is all backwards...the definitions must be used to describe the event...you cannot let the event describe the definitions!
Sir#1 and Sir#2, in unison: Hence the problem with recursion.
There's a spot in 'Freshman', by verve pipe that goes "she a punk who never really took advice"...this strikes me pretty hard each time, and I really dunno why. Maybe my ideal girlfriend/soulmate is a punk rocker. I dearly hope so...no, I know so. St any rate, this jolting thought got me into a weird mindset, and I decided to make myself a CD. A CD for me (and other capital letters besides). This came as an odd shock, because although I�ve made CDs for testing purposes, and made CDs for other people, it never really crossed my mind to make one for me. Not a punk compilation, of a �best of the whatevers�...just, songs that make me think, make me sit and *sigh*. I�m still working on the cover, but the title will be �Malice In Wonderland�...here are some of the thongs I sought of:
verve pipe: freshman
our lady peace: superman's dead
ben fold�s five: mess
u2: staring at the sun
soul asylum: the sun maid
nerfherder: hospital
blind melon: no rain
eric clapton: tears in heaven
dom mclean: american pie
marcy playground: america
eels: feelin' good
counting crows: (colorblind, raining in Baltimore, perfect blue buildings)
david bowie: space oddity
beatles: let it be
monkees: daydream believer
beetoven: furlise
pink floyd: mother
tom petty: last dance with mary jane
red hot chilli peppers: californication
crash test dummies: superman's song
billy joel: lullabye
