people
2000-07-02 - 15:54:40
*tallymarks out the Wong Foo, unless I can get hold of a grayhound*
I saw...*droll*...real people today! I had to go on an eight-hour trip downstate to see them, but at least I know they exist now. And that reminds me: my father is siC. My step-sister put her shoulderstrap behind her while we were driving, because it is understandably uncomfortable. He insisted that she put it back in the proper position, despite my argument against it, because the added 20% of life protection in an accident is not worth the uncomfortableness if you only get in accidents less than one percent of the time. He told me that the 20% was a good excuse for her to be wearing it, and then told me that I'd understand it when I got older. Well, in the next several minutes, I must have aged. There are only two conceivable reasons why he would have insisted: a, he is a good and caring father, and b, he really wanted to have her wearing the seat belt, so that it would divide and redefine his fifteen-year-old step-daughter's C-cup chest. My father is well into his forties. I dearly hope I'm never as perverted as that. I dearly hope that most of the world sees the perversity in his actions. But I doubt it. It's a sad, sad world.
In other news, one out of every three Americans is obese. Please pass the corn dog.
I miss the dead rats, Kebler Elves, the closed post offices, the slow-moving cars, and the shopping carts. I miss cautions signs in the rain, stuffed bunnies, and monkeys that no one could see. I miss lifting to the Police, green food colouring, surprise candies in mailboxes, and signs that say "get it on, assmunch sale, $.79" I miss making fun of preschool hairdos, talking on the floor with Tonya, and Vicki's cute little smile. I miss plotting to steal couches, and smoking up in the graveyard. I miss being an extra in Dave's anti-femm movies. I miss having deep philosophical conversations in metaphoric codes, and pillow fights, road signs, and stripping. I miss tying balloons to my pants, and putting "try me" stickers on my chest. I miss rubbing heads, poking, laughing, hugging, tickling, cuddling, and kissing. I miss all the friends I knew last year, and before. I miss being around someone that understands me. I miss...that little piece of me that I will never get back.
