Jason�s Life Soup, in a nutshell (and a reference for the rest of us)
'the before time' - 00:00:00
Jason's Life Soup, in a nutshell
Disclaimer: i takeseth no responsibilities fer peopleth who do noteth understandish this 'ere diary.
PEOPLE: �A little dishonesty goes a long way.� -Nemo
The Village Idiot: "...it's a motherfucker, gettin' through a Sunday, talking to the walls, just me again..." -Eels
Me: i have two hobbies: being myself, and finding out what that means. NY Apartment #2 "Dogs bark and mosquitoes bite, scratchin' the itch that makes it feel good..." -Eels
Jim: works for time warner and has an unsettling love for everything involving peanuts.
Bill: drives a mustang and works in massachusetts.
Lauren: mitch's girlfriend and a graduate student at RPI.
Amy: exotic dancer and the proud owner of a terrabyte of porn.
Megan: amy's sister, ex-army chic with angel wing tattoos on her back.
Joe: amy's boyfriend of three years, with a PhD in all things unmentionable.
Mitch: Living with me from May to August, between college and graduate school.
NY Apartment #1: "Like a simile i paint suggestive pictures..." -Harvey Danger Band
Chris: my vegetarian roommate, worked at a radio station and did enviro-stuff at RPI. is probably out there somewhere, still saving the world from itself.
Marwin: artist/philosopher/future animal-helper/once physics-comp-sci concentrated/anime-loving girl who played RPGs.
Newton Centre, Machusetts: "...everyone needs to be somebody, everyone needs to find someone who cares..." -Eels
Dave (aka the Koskinator): veterinary major who lived next door to me 2002-2003, academic calendar. fan of asain food, asain cartoons, and asain porn. knows Chinatown in Boston pretty well, and is fun to go on driving trips with, especially because he has a vibration-activated light in the back seat, and it�s easy to think in the back of his car, while he blasts techno. was available at lycane.diaryland.com
Joe: dave�s friend who went to a North Eastern. knows a good amount of computer stuff, and is a math major, specializing in fractal geometry. officially recognized by KAZAA (TM) officials to have downloaded more data than should be possible for a living life form, mostly movies.
Josh: RA and roleplayer with dave, but not nearly as crazy-fun as he�d like to be. very large man who tries very hard not to be scary. a fan of many varieties of porn.
Jesse: part of a larger team of close-knit people, all of the age to legally drink themselves under the table. graphic design major who likes to listen to music and tell you jokes that he's already told you.
Dyani: supercute girl who, despite appearances, really has her act together. Amazing at kissing, a master at behind_closed_door_arts, and surprisingly intelligent, though she watches TV like it�s 2006, especially fashion shows and basketball.
Zulay: dyani�s really close friend, evidently had a crush on me.
Becky: meghan�s roommate and friend. tall blonde backwoods girl that is slightly oversensitive to other people�s feelings; psyche major. Meghan: becky�s roommate and friend. Normal-sized brunette who thinks fun thoughts. undecided, but secretly a music major.
Limestone, ME: "...the operator answers, and 'says you're not alone'..." -Eels
Jon: The bestest roommate ever, from 1999 to 2001, academic calendar. he smoked on the occasion in high school, amid good conversations and good poetry. he is the inventor of Pseudocrack (see below).
Rebecka (aka reckabeck, becca, bex or variants thereof, not including 'becky' or 'rebecca'): supercute girl, all around amazing. lived in the northern part of Maine, but can now be found in the lower part of maine as an art major. "Life is a confession." was at razzmatazz.diaryland.com
Doug: "The universe is fucking." becca�s father, art teacher and part of a band called Emptyhead.
JenB: one of Bex's old friends, in and out of love. was at frailty.diaryland.com and jen0va.scribble.nu
Muerl: the surrogate mascot of my school. he�s been here for three years, and has played a key role in most of them, simply with his presence. he�s a large guy, but very funn to wrestle and very comfy if you can get him to stay still for a bit (the FBI came after him twice durring his high school years, for hacking). currently attending WPI, computer science.
Dustin: he likes weed, but he�ll smoke whatever you got. in fact, he�ll snort sugar off your floor if he spills it. a funny guy who gets Cuban cigars from the pants of his border-jumping Pakistani friend (whom I call Ed). he�ll dance around the lounge in tights with me anytime. good accomplice material, when he's not putting his head through vending machines.
Gillian: sort of stuck-up, sort of rich, and sort of funn to hang around with, when she�s not depressed and obsessed with what people are thinking about her.
Tonner: gillian�s best friend at school, and another qoo person to hang out with. went to a church camp with her where we lit candles, before i knew her in high school.
Didi: bigtime flit. her and i had an ongoing competition for most flirtatious behaviour, but in our senior year she took the cake, and ate it too.
Sara: one of didi�s girlfriends. enjoys piercing random parts of her body and using her favorite euphemism for sex, �hoo-ha�. very loud person.
Jenny: unstable. we were sort of friends my first year at MSSM, and flirted some in our senior year, but she is, all things uneven, not something a person wants to get too close to...never really got over her hobbies of cutting her legs and drinking her boyfriends� blood.
Joe: similarly unstable person. prefers instead to carve happy faces into his wrist.
Knox: without a doubt, one of the coolest guys I know, who also incidentally has the worst luck with female-things. he dyed his skin with me for Halloween for our first year at my high school, and I�ll never forget it. not because we got grand_prize_thing, but because it was one of those surrealistic nights.
Dave (aka Frosty): very independent, very movie-orientated, very talkative. graduated from my high school the year before I did. went out with Amanda for a long time. was at bologna36.diaryland.com
Amanda: a quirky friend? a college-girl fling from my high school days? i really dunno. but she�s pretty qoo, and �Monkeys� was, and will always be, the ultimate code word. was at
buggygirl.diaryland.com
Pittsfield, ME: "...i just wanna be a page, in jeannie's diary..." -Eels
Jen: black-plastic-rat girl who was a bit too much into guys that did drugs. always trying to help other people, maybe a little too much. the last time i saw her she was still living with her mother and creatively making what is uncreatively known as 'JenArt'. she got sorta flustered if you ran around her house without being fully clothed. my collective Inhabitants (see below) will miss the person she was. deceased as of April 18, 2001.
Mitch (aka michy-poo): my bestest friend in this reality. we�ve had more than our share of adventures...wrestling fights, hours of oldskool Quake (TM) games, countless RPG stories, and general meyhem. he will never rest until he is satisfied with his understanding of things. can currently be found going to Stonybrook to gomplete his graduate degree.
Lucy: what to tell. washes her hands and takes showers way too much to be healthy. one of the better conversationalists i know, though i now only know of her online persona. can be found at kero.diaryland.com
Tim (aka Monkey): another RPG player, who skipped a grade, because.
Nathan: is of an intelligent breed, except when it comes to girls, in which he knows nothing, but so much more than i.
The Family: "...guess who's living here with the great undead..." -Eels
Mum: my mommy. she enjoys drinking cheap cigarettes, smoking cheap tea, and taking short walks to the general store (where she works, sometimes). lives in a rented runn-down house with several cats, and a pitbull named oreo. very lonely and technically insane, but we loves her all the same.
Sarah: my favorite/older sister. enjoys Marlboros (TM), Winnie The Pooh (TM), Budweiser (TM), and sex with rodeo cowboys. has recently been raising members of the 'rodeo cowboys' species. when we were little, she made me memorize all the secondary character's lines to every Disney movie that existed.
Sister: My other sister, with a degree in cullinary arts. used to watch a whole lot of TV and aspired to be an actress: �i'm gonna go to UMO so i don't have to pay for intuition.�
Father: over time, i've gained considerably more respect for this bald, round-bellied figure who i will one day grow to resemble. learning disabled. incapable of real philosophical conversation, but he tries, so he gets points *point-getting noise*.
Step-mother: very organized, very manipulative Methodist pastor. spent a couple years in her off-pastor time as a speech therapist, working with learning disabled children, like her husband.
Step-brother: older than sarah and currently living in Georgia, working on a veterinary degree. very qoo, but never around.
Step-sister: half-sister to step-brother, and a punk/goth. she's got the faded dyed hair, six-inch platform boots, and uncomfortably tight pleather outfits. very nearly bought one of everything in Hot Topic (TM), where she works part time. a couple summers ago, she worked for some disembodied branch of the CIA, cutting clippings out of foreign newspapers.
Step-father: homophobic, fairly close-minded, and prefers a drunken or stoned state of mind. the only thing keeping him from being an ideal redneck is that he's read upwards of well over six thousand books, and keeps a pretty large library. works on a dairy farm.
Jeff: step-father's brother. sarah's favorite step-uncle and an accomplished drunk. Was sent to mental rehabilitation (after which i refer to him as Jeffery) and is currently working at an antique and bait shoppe with his wife-thing who has snappy, intelligent comebacks.
THE INHABITANTS (the collection of people in my head): "a strand of light suspended by a thumbtack in the drywall..." -Harvey Danger Band
Goblyn/Goblin (who the diary is most for), is a chaotic-neutral aligned green-skinned mischievous being. Luther (who has Ted Bundy�s jaw line) is a charming lawful-evil man with serious outlook on his non-serious murderous intentions. Simon is a Buddha-like man that is stuck in a sitting position all day and thinks without speaking. he is sometimes mistaken for a misshaped walnut, sometimes for a statue, but always a sense of inspiration. The Sirs are�representative of the dialogue approach to describing ideas. though they are basically the same person, they play devil�s advocate against one another for the sake of conversation. Jessica: my trenchcoat in reality, but takes the form of a seductive professional theif in my head. Archibald: a former janitor from the future that i�ve hired to fix holes in my head that prelude psychological scars. when the hole is closed, he may do some sort of painting on the inside of the dome. Nemo is latin for no-one or an anonymous someone. Omni is latin for everyone, and represents a hive-mind point of view. Johnny is a small child with a paranoia complex, or generalized phobia. Me, Myself, and I: blind, deaf, and dumb, repectively. Jade: my pet car, my one true love (1984 BMW 528e black). The Pheonix: my second car (Dodge daytona 2.4L red).
PLACES. "...meanwhile, an old couple argues inside The Queen Bee, the siC flourecent light shimmering on their skin... " -Eels
Exeter, Maine: Where Mum lives. Really small town in central Maine where i went to elementary school. if you see a car, step out and take a picture, because they be rare around them parts. usually people drive lawnmowers to the general store, and smoke buckets of weed as if it were pennycandy (which can still be found here as well). in a town of about five-hundred (mostly over 60 years old) where the deer outnumber the humans, nobody really cares if you walk on any of the three roads in your bathrobe. no cops. fun parties on the fourth of july.
Pittsfield, Maine: where i used to goto high school. evil english-orientated school with self-centered people bent on being popular and watching TV (very much like what i consider 'the rest of the world'). "integrated science" courses prevented the students from learning new things, and a very negative atmosphere thrived in the town itself. ten year olds in the pool hall, can barely see over the edge of the table, so they go out for a cigarette break instead.
Houlton, Maine: where the highway ends. if cars are rare in Exeter, people under the age of 30 are even harder to find here. the cops are fun to play with, because they have a good mix of rangers, border patrol (Canadian border within walking distance) and state police forces. i never really called this home, but lived there durring the summers when i was in Limestone.
Newton Centre, Massachusetts: This is where I went to college the first time. not much to do, but potential for mischief is high because it�s so-called one of the safest towns/areas in the US. lots of rich people pretending to have more money than they really do, spending a lot of money on their houses so they can feel good when they jog in the morning.
THINGS. �i wear newspapers for pants, and a tee shirt that says �damn i'm good" -Eeels
Pseudocrack: Sour Patch Kids (TM) sugar crushed up with Altoids (TM). wonderful stuff.
RPGs: Role Playing Games. you pretend to be someone your not, so you can do things that make sense things, in a make-believe world. i stopped role-playing in my sophomore year of high school, and started again in college (one of those habits that dies hard).
Eels and Harvey Danger: my two favourite bands.
Coke: i am a madd cokefiend. i drink about two liters a day.
IUT: Imaginary Universal Tool. It has the ability to do anything one can think of, but I use it for those impossible tasks that, if they were possible, would be considered mundane.
JLS: Jason's Life Soup. An acronym for my personal POV of this planet.
Smeagol: my pet cat that can work a doorknob like nobody�s business.
